Finished IC updates for 1984 focused revisions around 6:30 am (Eli, Emily, Joey, Ashlee, Nynena, Kevin); working on other grade updates (e.g., vocab revisions for Siddhartha vocab quiz) this morning. Thanks for your patience.
Write down the title of each possible text...
Each one of these texts are in your Language of Composition textbook; you will often find insightful commentary there.
Take out your Composition Notebook...take good notes...you can use this on the semester exam!
HW: This weekend, I recommend you read each of these in your textbooks, and write notes in your composition notebook.
Let's review Matt's rhet analysis of a 1984 passage
Let's also read one of the selected articles (Why I Love Sports) and talk about what we notice and look at a student example.
Wesley
English IV AP 7
21 December 2015
Sports
are Best
Hardly
any American has grown up with out being thrown into at least one community
youth sports team or a competitive game of gym class kickball. Sports are a staple in American life whether
you play them, watch them, or write about them for a career like Rick
Reilly. In Reilly’s Why I Love My Job he describes the wonderful moments he has had in
a career of writing in sport magazines in order to refute the idea presented by
his old journalism professor who claimed that he was “better than sports”. Reilly uses parallel structure, a rich and
humorous tone, and comparisons to argue that he will never be better than
sports in an essay that proves to be more about the people involved in sports
than the actual task of writing about them.
It
is clear from reading Reilly’s work that he is proficient in the use of ethos,
pathos, logos and organizing his points in a way that allows the reader to
quickly analyze what they will read in an upcoming paragraph. Reilly begins each paragraph using some
version of “Sports is” pared with some sort of quality sports possess, whether
it be “real…Oprah for guys…woven deeper in American life than you
know…unscripted”. By using parallel
structure this way, Reilly is able to clearly organize each paragraph into
variations of ethos, pathos, and logos and give real life examples, thus
clearly supporting his thesis of how sports are better than him. Parallel structure personifies sports and
makes us believe that it is the sports that are great and not the people
participating in the sports. “Sports has
mercy…Sports has honor” Reilly writes before relaying a story of young athletes
who acted as great people and teammates.
This use of parallel structure combined with pathos and personification
proves that sports demonstrate incredible qualities. Parallel structure is simple and clearly
conveys the message of the article and lets the reader dive quickly into
Reilly’s support and not have to sort through anything.
What
really makes a reader remember Reilly’s essay and the message he presents, is
his rich and humorous tone. Truth be
told, the article doesn’t seem humorous when it begins, but humor is sprinkled
in through out the article because of references to famous people, stories of
sports fans, and comparisons to non sport related activities. The most notable forms of humor came at the
very end of the essay as Reilly explains “Lastly—and most important – sports is
the place where beer tastes best. So
here’s to you, professor. I’m glad to
know I’m not better than sports. But you
did show me I’m better than one thing: advice from professors.” Reilly’s humor gives the reader the chance to
think a little more half heartedly about the essay and the words that the
professor told Reilly as a young journalism student, and presents the essay in
a more carefree manner, but still proves Reilly’s point. Humor relates to the reader and when used
correctly as Reilly did, it adds even more support to the argument by
demonstrating that there are great things in sports.
The final and most
impactful rhetorical device that Reilly uses to support his argument is
comparisons. Reilly uses the parallel
structure he set up to present a story and then compares that story to an
example for a non-sport related activity that seems weak in comparison. When explaining the honor in sports, Reilly
tells of two girls Texas volleyball teams who acted graciously in the wake of
an injured player and then juxtaposes that by writing “And yet last year in
Alaska, Senator Ted Stevens (R) ran for reelection despite seven felony
convictions”. By doing this, Reilly
undermines the non-sport related activity, in this case politicians, and brings
more support and appreciation to the sports. When comparing sports with non-sports Reilly
is also able to reference people that most of the general public, and sport
fans in particular, know and are familiar with.
Reilly writes “Sports is real. If
you’re Henry Fonda’s son and you want to act, you get to act. If you’re Chelsea Clinton and you want to
govern, you get to govern…[But] If Tom Brady suddenly can’t throw the 30-yard
out, he’s benched, dimple or no dimple.”
Reilly carefully selects who to compare and how to compare them in order
to prove that sports are better than just about anything else, be it politics,
arts, etc. Using comparisons relates to
the reader and helps to convey Reilly’s main message because he is able to set
sports high above everything else.
When a teacher
tells you that you think you are better than what you are doing, some people
might think of it as a compliment, but not Rick Reilly. Reilly easily and clearly coveys his idea
that sports are better than him, and with the array of rhetorical devices used,
and with his clear love for sports, its hard to imagine that he could ever
write about anything else. Reilly’s
passion and easy to read tone support his argument and leave the reader wishing
there was more.
Wesley
English IV AP
21 December 2015
Americans
are the Walking Dead
Today’s
society is being transformed into something like that of a zombie world and in My Zombie, Myself: Why Modern Life Feels
Rather Undead, Chuck Klosterman makes that very clear to the reader. Today,
the average American is constantly working towards something— the next
paycheck, a promotion, an A on an English paper-- but in the process, many of
them begin to feel their brains turning to mush, their bodies being put on
autopilot, and they begin to look like the literal walking dead. In his piece,
Klosterman compares modern-day life to a zombie world through allusion,
analogy, and pathos.
Klosterman
effectively uses allusion to signal to the reader that zombies are second-nature,
almost like they always knew that they were a part of them. Zombies have one
motive, “the consumption of flesh;” currently, Americans also have one motive;
to get the job done. No matter what that job is, they effectively transform
into a “creature who can’t talk [and] doesn’t think.” Klosterman’s use of this
allusion highlights the effect of everyday pressure on the average American. In
addition, Klosterman also alludes Americans to zombies by stating “the more you
fill them with bullets, the more interesting they become.” How can this not be
true for any American? The word “bullet” correlates to any goal or task that
the Average Joe has to get done. As tasks, or “bullets,” pile onto Joe’s to-do
list, he starts to become not-so-average; he starts to go crazy. Being busy is
not a bad thing, but when someone has too much on their plate, they
simultaneously turn into a zombie, and Klosterman emphasizes this through very
effective allusion.
Moreover,
Klosterman’s use of analogy and comparison underlines the scary appearance of
zombie-like characteristics in every modern American. “Zombie killing is
philosophically similar to reading and deleting 400 work e-mails on a Monday
morning or filling out paperwork that only generates more paperwork.” Klosterman’s
analogy helps the reader realize that no matter what the job is or where they
work, almost every person has a part of their job that they just do not enjoy.
Additionally, he states that “as long as [Americans] keep deleting whatever’s
in front of [them, they] survive.” Guns are to zombies as delete buttons are to
Americans; if someone shoots a zombie, he’s momentarily dead; if someone
deletes an email or text, there is a momentary solution. Klosterman helps the
reader to understand this concept through strong analogies that are easily
relatable to everyday life.
Lastly,
Klosterman uses pathos to connect the reader’s life with a zombie’s. “Zombie
killing is…following Twitter gossip out of obligation or preforming tedious
tasks in which the only true risk is being consumed by the avalanche.” The use
of analogy tied together with pathos emotionally strikes every teen reader
immediately; scrolling through endless Twitter junk just to be able to say
that, “yes, I did see Kimye’s baby’s name, and yes I did see [insert name]’s
tweet about [insert name],” is something any teen wants. In addition, everyone
has felt like a zombie at 10:30pm while they are rushing to get the busy-work
Spanish assignment done because Señora is collecting it tomorrow. Klosterman takes
a stab right at the heart of the reader, and he does so very impressively. More
importantly, Americans “live to eliminate the zombies of tomorrow.”
Klosterman’s use of pathos here arouses many emotions in any reader’s heart; no
matter what the goals of the reader are at any point in their life, Klosterman
underlines the fact that the zombie-world is a never-ending cycle, and every
day Americans wake up and try to defeat their daily struggles just to wake up
to the same daily struggles the next day. Klosterman emphasizes his point
through very powerful pathos that immediately causes the reader to do some
self-reflection.
Overall,
Klosterman’s use of allusion, analogy, and pathos aid the reader in
understanding that their average American life is shockingly similar to a
zombie world. The use of these rhetorical elements urges the reader to compare
zombies to “how their day-to-day existence feels” and leaves a convincing
impression on them. Currently, Americans are transforming into past characters
of movies and shows that nobody ever thought could be real. The average working
American is a Walking Dead; and they probably do not even realize it.
Mr. Wesley
English 4AP
22 November 2016
A
Wonderfully Worded Warning
In his classic, dystopian novel 1984, George Orwell pits Winston Smith
against the totalitarian regime known as the Party. Although satirical,
Orwell’s exaggeration of power in the novel raises an important question: What
is stopping 1984 from becoming a
reality? Orwell intended 1984 to
serve as a warning of what can happen when governments take too much control
over its citizens. In the final part of the novel, Winston undergoes torture
when O’Brien and the Thought Police capture him for his unorthodox views.
Orwell embellishes this section of the book with similes, logos, and symbolism
to portray the overall message warning society from embracing totalitarian
ideals while also providing hope that humanity can be restored.
Focusing on pages 267-270, Winston
is in his second stage of reintegration: understanding. Orwell uses this
section to explain the ideals of the Party and how they will remain in absolute
control. O’Brien, Winston’s interrogator, describes their world as one “of fear
and treachery and torment, a world of trampling and being trampled upon”
(Orwell 267). Rather than promoting love and justice, the Party promotes self-destructive
characteristics among its citizens. Love creates families and families are
loyal to one another. By taking away love and replacing it with hatred, the
Party creates a society that is only loyal to its government. The continuous
warfare against the two Asian powers illustrates this effect. By constantly
being involved in war, the citizens of Oceania have a common enemy to direct
their hatred at. Then, lies are spread over the telescreens about how progress
is being made in the war effort, reaffirming the people’s faith in the Party. However,
Orwell also writes about how there is still hope that humanity can be restored,
even when the ideas of love and family are forgotten. Even after O’Brien
tortures, starves, and explains how the Party’s victory is inevitable, Winston
still believes that, someday, the Party will be destroyed: “There is something
in the universe- I don’t know, some spirit, some principle- that you will never
overcome” (270). Orwell uses Winston in this part of the book as means to
convey that, even when human nature has been destroyed, there is still hope
that it can be restored. Winston knows how things were before the endless war.
Winston knows that 2+2=4. Winston knows that the Party is based on deception,
manipulation, and fear. If Winston can overcome the strength of the Party, so
can the rest of Oceania. Orwell further strengthens these two messages with his
use of rhetorical devices.
For the Party to remain in control,
the citizens of Oceania need to be dehumanized, which Orwell reveals through
his use of similes. Be removing the love between parents and children, the
Party creates a society where “children [can] be taken from their mothers at
birth, as one takes eggs from a hen” (267). By comparing a parent’s greatest
fear to a common, everyday event, Orwell reveals the horror of life under the
Party. Parents no longer care if their children are taken from them. Neighbors
no longer look for one another. Taking away love and compassion from the citizens
of Oceania makes it easier for the Party to take absolute control. The children
that they take away can be molded into perfect, Big Brother-loving patriots and
neighbors can turn each other in for treason without a second glance. Orwell
goes further and explains how competing pleasures will be destroyed. The Party
takes away everything it means to be human: love, compassion, intelligence, etc.
Even the sexual instinct will become merely a formality like the annual renewal
of a ration card (267). By taking away human nature, the Party is able to fill
these blank slate humans with love of Big Brother and loyalty to their
government. By comparing important life events to everyday occurrences, Orwell demonstrates
the power the Party has over its people.
Next, Orwell uses an appeal to logic
to reveal how the Party will retain control permanently. The Party can already mold
people’s thoughts anyway they like. However, they still need to eradicate the
free-thinkers and the people who remember the time before the Revolution, such
as Winston. To do this, the Party creates a group known as the Brotherhood
whose purpose is to bring an end to the totalitarian regime. Normally, it would
prove illogical to create opposition to one’s own cause. However, the Party
uses the Brotherhood to locate and exterminate anyone with unorthodox views.
This is the very way O’Brien caught Winston. Winston believes that O’Brien is
part of the Brotherhood and admits that he wishes to bring an end to the Party.
The next day, the Thought Police arrive at Mr. Charrington’s shop to arrest
Winston. By creating an enemy, the Party will find the heretic at its mercy
“screaming with pain, broken up, contemptible-and in the end utterly penitent,
saved from himself, crawling to [the Party’s] feet of his own accord” (268). By
using logos, Orwell illustrates how creating an imaginary group of rebels will
further lead to the end of individual thought and the supreme control of the
Party.
However, Orwell also provides hope
for the return of humanity, turning Winston into a symbol: “the guardian of the
human spirit” (270). Even after torture, interrogation, and mental exhaustion,
Winston still loves Julia, and he believes that the Party will fail. Orwell thus
turns Winston into a symbol of hope. Through the Party’s lies and manipulation,
Winston never loses sight of what is true. As long as he believes that the
Party is evil and can be destroyed, there is hope for humanity yet. This is why
O’Brien takes so much time reintegrating Winston. If O’Brien can convert him
into an orthodox Party member, all hope for humanity will be destroyed. If
someone dies hating Big Brother, that person will become a martyr and their
ideas will continue to live on in the people they influenced. When O’Brien
successfully converts Winston, he essentially turns Winston into a hypocrite
who will be forgotten and erased from time. Orwell’s purpose in turning Winston
into a symbol of hope was to reveal that no one can have complete control over
another’s actions. Winston knows from the moment he buys the diary in Chapter 1
that he will be disintegrated. However, he follows the path anyway because he
knows that a life of rebellion is better than a life as a brainwashed citizen
of Oceania.
Through his use of similes, logos, and symbolism, Orwell
creates a section of 1984 that
illustrates how the novel not only serves as a warning for the advancements in
governmental influence but also as a symbol of hope that humanity will endure. The
Party can eliminate human emotion and locate insurgents, yet people like
Winston still stand against it in hope that human nature will prevail. Some
people view 1984 as a prophesy and
that the dictatorship of Oceania will one day reveal itself in the real world. Even
if it does, Orwell gives us hope that mankind can overcome whatever lies ahead.
Rationale: After viewing my rubric and revised paper, I have
concluded that the focus of my revisions should be in the essay’s conciseness.
If I successfully increase my conciseness, my writing will be much easier to
understand, and more directly address the claim. I will do my best to not work
around any points, and use direct syntax to address a statement. Also, the lack
of specificity led to many overstatements. Overall, the lack of concise syntax
and precise diction in my paper were major downfalls, making it difficult for
the reader to understand my ideas.
Men are different than women.
That is a fact. 
restriction. 
Now,
you may ask, how does